How To Get Back With Your Ex Boyfriend - Rekindling The Romance
Dating is a skill. Getting your boyfriend back after a breakup? Same type of thing. If you're unconfident and unsure of yourself, you'll be hard-pressed to succeed. But if you know what you're doing? Reversing a breakup can go smoothly and easily.
Ever really want someone, and then go out and get them? Dating begins as an audition, and once you've got your foot in the door you get to show that person who you truly are.
By the same token, getting an ex boyfriend back after you've been dumped requires a lot of the same things. First you need to get him to listen to you, and then you need to know the right things to say. Without both of those things, any attempts you make to get back with your ex boyfriend will always fall short.
In short, reversing your breakup has two basic requirements: re-opening the lines of communication between you and your ex boyfriend, and getting him to both miss and need you back in his life once again.
Knowing these goals before you begin can really help prepare you for the process of winning him back.
Initial Reactions and Opening Moves After The Break
The bad news is that if you're reading this, your boyfriend probably already broke up with you. The techniques mentioned below work best if you apply them during or immediately after the breakup process. The good news however, is that it's never too late to win back the man you love. If you're willing to take the right steps, and avoid the wrong ones, there's always a path that leads back into his heart.
Your ex boyfriend had a distinct advantage when he dumped you: he already knew it was coming. He'd considered the decision for a while before he finally sat down to talk to you about it. You on the other hand, were completely taken by surprise. In an effort to keep your boyfriend from breaking things off, you may have said or done things that are detrimental to getting him back.
Did you cry? Ask for a second chance? Explain how good you are together, and how it would be a mistake to break up? These things probably seemed like a good idea at the time, but they're actually actions that can push a guy away. Most guys who break up with a girl want to drop the bomb quickly and then leave as soon as possible... they don't want to sit around for a heartwrenching discussion about how their decision isn't the right one.
Instead offering resistance or denial, the best opening moves always include you walking away in agreement with the break up. Yup... that's right: agreeing with your boyfriend's decision to end the relationship is one of the fastest ways to win him back again.
Indifference and Acceptance - The Keys to Making Your Ex Want You
Every break up is temporary until someone makes it permanent. Whether your relationship was good, bad, or downright ugly, your boyfriend broke up with you so he could have the freedom to look for someone else.
Your first goal therefore, is to make him realize he's giving up someone awesome: YOU. In order to move on, you need your ex boyfriend to realize that he's taking a huge risk here, because he could lose you for good.
This is why chasing after your exboyfriend is such a critical mistake. Right after the breakup happens, your ex looks to see how affected by it you are. The more you're upset, the stronger he'll feel that he can get you back whenever he wants. This in turn makes him comfortable, and he has little incentive to pay you much attention.
On the flip side, when you act as if the breakup doesn't bother you at all... you throw your boyfriend into total confusion. You're reacting in a way he never imagined, and you're doing the opposite of what he expected.
At this point he'll start wondering why you aren't fighting for him, and whether or not you really cared about the romance int he first place. Most guys will even wonder if you've got someone else you'd rather be with, and this will spawn jealousy. All of these things are good at making your ex want you again. In learning how to get back with your ex boyfriend, creating these doubts in his mind can go a long way toward reversing your break up.
Opening Moves For After The Breakup Has Already Happened
Now if your breakup has already occured, don't worry because it's still not too late to put forth vibes of acceptance and indifference. Even if it's been days or weeks since your ex broke up with you, there are easy ways of letting him know exactly where you stand.
The best involves sending him a short, one-paragraph letter. Write it out in only two or three sentences, and send it by mail. Don't email it, text-message it, or type it up. Don't call him after you send it either, and don't answer your phone if he calls you. The letter should read something like:
"You were right - being apart is totally the best thing. Things definitely weren't working for either one of us. I wish you the best, and take care"
Don't sign your letter "love" or anything like that. It should be simple and straightforward, with an air of finality to it. Your ex boyfriend should be intrigued by this letter, and it should make him wonder what in your life has changed. He'll start wondering if you met another guy, or if you're just finally moving on. He won't want either of these things, because keeping you 'available' is always more comfortable than losing you for good.
From there, your next moves involve making your ex boyfriend miss you. There are easy ways to do this, without him even knowing you did anything. Learning these techniques can help accelerate the process of getting back with your ex boyfriend, especially if you learn when and how to apply them.
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